Twisted Mind's Journal|
[Most Recent Entries]
Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
Twisted Mind's LiveJournal:
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|Saturday, September 4th, 2004|
I'm taking the year off college. After my 11 days in detox in Morgantown (back in April) , I was sent to eating disorder treatment. I went to Menninger Clinic in Houston, Texas, where I weighed in at 92 lbs. Two weeks after I got there, I was asked to leave because the found a half-smoked joint among my possessions, and though I did a drug test (which was negative) they kicked me out. I spent two more weeks there, arranging my travel plans, and then I went to Roger's Memorial Hospital in Oconomowoc, Wisconsin. The EDC at RMH was so much better than Texas...it was bigger, and just more relaxed and more like a residential atmosphere. I spent twelve weeks there, and then finally discharged on August 3. Well there's my summer in a nutshell. I'm just gonna be chillin at home for a while, so let me know if anyone wants to hang out...just clean, sober fun...
|Wednesday, March 31st, 2004|
Ordinary People (Judith Guest):
To have a reason to get up in the morning, it is necessary to possess a guiding principle.
Haven't lost your sense of humor after all but your sense of identity is what seems to be misplaced. No. Wrong. You don't lose what you never had.
Keep moving, keep busy, everything will fall into place, it always does.
Get the motions right. Motives will follow. That is Faith.
Don't squirm don't panic release is inevitable. Soon soon.
I'd like to be more in control, I guess. So people can quit worrying about me.
|Thursday, March 4th, 2004|
I'm sorry, I really can't. I wish you could remember what you said, or I wish it hadn't happened like that. You hurt me...'I'm sorry' just can't fix this. Maybe after break, but now, it's just too hard.
|Tuesday, February 24th, 2004|
I was never hurt like that before...I just can't do it anymore.
|Friday, February 20th, 2004|
:::sigh::: I've been laying here in bed since tuesday. On monday, I went to the health center, and they told me I had a sinus infection. I woke up on tuesday with a temp of 102.5 and my friend dragged me to Urgent Care. So I went, and apparently I have mono and strep throat. What fun! So I've been laying here for four days, and I am bored out of my freaking mind.
I withdrew from rush, too. I was too sick to go to Skit Night on Tuesday, so when I went to get my invitations on wednesday, a bid from the gams wasn't there :-( I was so upset...I couldn't understand, because they were really the only ones I wanted. So I just decided to withdraw, and I guess I'll just go through in the fall.
Well, that's it for now kiddies...
|Wednesday, February 11th, 2004|
It's been a long week and it's only Wednesday. I signed up for Rush and our first get together was last night. I think it's going to be okay...I'm a little nervous that they might not like me or something, though...I don't know. Rush goes for about two weeks...we get our bids a week from Friday, so until then, I'm just trying to be myself and make the best impression that I can. I wish I could say more, but I'm tired and I have more homework to get to...
Barefoot- free, rebellious, and wild, you hate
boundries and rules. You tend to be on the
crazy side and often sweep people up along with
you. You are most likely the leader of your
group of friends. [please vote! thank you! :)] What Kind of Shoe Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
|Thursday, February 5th, 2004|
|Sunday, December 28th, 2003|
|Wednesday, December 17th, 2003|
Christmas break has finally started! Actually, it started a week ago, but I'm only now updating my journal. Things are okay, I guess. I'm sick, which is absolutely no fun, but other than that, it's all good. I should see my baby again in two days...hopefully on friday sometime. On a rather happy note, especially for everyone who's been telling us we have to, Chas and I have decided to quit smoking. So yay for us!
|Tuesday, December 9th, 2003|
Dying is an art
which some do well
which some do often.
Dying is like falling through a space
where there are no arms to catch you,
like falling off a cliff,
holding on for dear life,
and no one's there to pull you up.
Like sailing a boat
on rocky water,
where waves lick the boat
and rain shades your vision.
A place where tears are often,
flown down your face like
rainwater on a window.
Dying is like crawling
through a dark, damp cave,
where everything smells of mud,
where you must crawl through
a foot high space,
using a flashlight to illuminate the world.
Suddenly you emerge into a room,
where rocks shoot up from the floor,
and rocks fall down from the ceinling.
You stand in the cool air,
breathing the smell of mud and bat dung.
You turn around three times,
your flashlight dies,
and you're left in the dark.
|Sunday, December 7th, 2003|
Just getting ready for exam week...it starts tomorrow...I needed a break from life
Take this if you feel like it: Annie's Blunt Truth Survey
|Monday, December 1st, 2003|
|Sunday, November 30th, 2003|
I stole this from several people on my friends page, but I guess it's a good idea...if you don't know me, even if you don't have a live journal, it's still cool to know that no one will know that it's you posting.
Post any comment that you want. Anything. A story, a secret, a confession, a fear, a love, how you feel about me -- anything. But, make sure to post it anonymously. Post twice if you'd like. Then, put this in your LJ to see what your friends (and perhaps others who you don't even realize read your LJ) have to say. Remember to make it anonymous, and honest. IP logging has been turned off. Current Mood: bored
|Tuesday, November 4th, 2003|
I don't know how much more of this I can take. I'm sad and I'm angry and I'm frustrated and I just don't know what to do or what to say. I'm fucking tired of feeling like shit, feeling like no one knows, feeling like I'm misunderstood. I've been lying in bed crying, because I feel everything at once and just don't know how to say it. I'm so tired, I'm worn out, I can't do this much longer. I was doing so well, I'm a normal weight, my scars are all healed. I just don't know anymore. I don't know what to say...I want to talk, but there are so many thoughts in my head that I can't say. I just don't know. I'll just go lie in bed, and maybe cry some more...I just don't know about anything anymore.
|Sunday, October 19th, 2003|
I'm confused and angry and upset and sad. I got too drunk last night, just like so many nights passed...the past four have been spent with me hugging a trashcan all night. But last night was the worst by far. Chas partied on his floor and I went out to Theta Xi. Before I left, I promised him that I would call when I got in to let him know that I was safe and okay. Around 11:30, I started puking at the house. Brendan, Lauren, and Claire got me into a car, but not before I had fallen over myself and puked down my front, completely missing the bucket. Brendan carried me up to my room, put me in a chair, and they left. I kicked off my shoes while continuing to puke. I tried to call Chas, but I couldn't move. Every time I opened my eyes I puked. Around 5 this morning I awoke with my head in the trashcan. I changed my clothes and crawled into bed. Once again, I puked. I fell asleep for a few hours, and got up at 9:30. The thought of just about anything makes me want to vomit right now, and I don't think I'm gonna be drinking for a while. Baby, I'm so sorry that I didn't call you. I knew I needed to, I wanted to, but I couldn't get there. I'm sorry... Current Mood: everything at once
|Thursday, September 4th, 2003|
Wow, I haven't updated this in almost a month...I've been so busy. I don't know what to write, because not much is going on. I tested out of Comp I, so that's REALLY exciting because someone decided that I just shouldn't take an english class this semster! YAY! Okay well I took this:
I'm not a blonde...am I???
|Wednesday, August 13th, 2003|
|Saturday, August 2nd, 2003|
I miss you so much...I layed awake last night until four thirty thinking of you...I miss you so much that my soul honestly aches. I love you, baby...tomorrow seems too far away Current Mood: lonely
|Sunday, July 27th, 2003|
So yeah, I'm in Florida...the language on this comp is weird...someone set it to German or to Polish or some strange, rather captivating European language...interesting yet annoying. It honestly took me three tries to find the Update button...shows I don't update often enough, huh? Let me know what you think the little icon means at the bottom...that feeling icon. Anyway, I'm n Florida, and it's very very hot and very very humid. It's almost too hot to step outside. I've been baked all day, and will probably be baked tonight...I don't know yet. I missed Chas' call last night :-( since I can remember that I've fallen asleep without hearing his voice. I often fall asleep while chatting, but not before we've talked. I slept all day yesterday...literally...got up, got baked, when back to sleep, got up to eat, fell asleep. I fell asleep at 9, reading about Charles Manson...I had the alarm set for midnight, but apparently I didn't wake up. I guess he called my cell phone after that, but I didn't hear it. The clock said call time: 1:23...I wish I hadn't fallen asleep...I miss him so much...one week baby, one week... Current Mood: creative
|Tuesday, July 22nd, 2003|